During Febuary and March we were stealing every piece of wood that wasn’t nailed down with the intention of building a polytunnel-cum-greenhouse down on the plot. We became expert skip scavengers and could, at 100 paces, determine whether or not the stuff folk were throwing away was going to be of use. Unfortunately, of course, we didn’t get around to building anything and are now lumbered with around 80 tomato, cucumber and pepper plants and nowhere to house them.

We are in the process of finding them good homes before Rambo and Sarah Connor, our pet rabbits, can eat them down to their stalks. If you’re local to South Birmingham and want one (a plant, not a rabbit) then get in touch.

Next year there will be a greenhouse at Camellotment…oh yes.

There is some informative commentary from Robson on this video but it gets lost somewhat as all the microphone picked up was the wind. In a nutshell, we’ve reclaimed around 1/8 of the plot from the weeds and we have carrots, roses, spuds and onions on the go.

Here y’go.

..which is a small, idiot proof video camera with built in software that posts your movies direct to the interweb. Providing we remember to take it with us when we go to the allotment we’ll be posting short videos here with our updates that will contain exciting footage of us standing around, smoking fags and doing the occasional bit of graft.

As you can see from Episode 1, we’ve allowed nature to undo all our winter good work by neglecting to acutally go to the allotment during the entire month of April. And May.

And March.

The weeds have therefore gone bananas and could probably hide Lord Lucan riding Shergar. We plan to get our arses in gear and sort it out, but to be honest all we really do is talk a good game so let’s see.   

I’d like to take this opportunity to apologise to our neighbours at Moor Green. All around us plots are thriving and well-tended whilst ours looks like Lotto Lout Michael Carroll himself has taken residence.

Mentally we have pulled our fingers out. Only time will tell if all this talk turns into action, innit.

More news and photos shortly

Is Gardening the new Rock n Roll?

Frankly, we couldn’t give two hoots….

However starting today we are launching the Camellotment Mixtape Challenge and first up is Camellotment Mixtape #1……A Mighty Love Mix

DOWNLOAD

Track listing:

Free – Mouthful of Grass / Jimmie Spheeris – Seeds of Spring / Seals & Crofts – Sweet Green Fields / The James Gang – Tend My Garden / Hugh Masekela – Grazin’ in the Grass / Kool & the Gang– Fruitman / Grant Green- Down Here on the Ground (Ummah remix feat. Dianne Reeves) / S.O.B. – The Soil I Tilled for You / La Clave – Sally Go Round the Roses / Michel Gonet – Flower Dance / The Originals – Sunrise / Minnie Riperton- Les Fleurs. 

Enjoy!

Mixtape # 2 will be posted shortly.

Incidentally….there has been some gardening action down at Camellotment recently. For instance, we installed a huge compost bin that we shall feed with scraps and organic rubbish over the winter. Additionally, and now that winter is finally here, we began to clear some more ground. The plan – such as it is – is for the plot to be completely dug over by the mid-Febuary 2008.

There will be further updates of activity as and when it happens, folks.

*********************************************************************

THE CAMELLOTMENT MIXTAPE CHALLENGE!

FAQ: 

OH MAN, I AM DESPERATE TO BECOME PART OF THIS!!! 

Great. If you want to submit a mixtape for Camellotment then the only rule is that the songs in the mix must have some connection to gardening and the joy of being outdoors. Other than that anything goes.

WHAT DO I DO NOW?

Create a mix in MP3 format and bung it up to somewhere on the interweb where we can get at it. We can recommend DivShare for this as it’s free and easy. Please do not send your mixes to our email inbox. We’ll grab your mix from the web and host it on our server, taking care of all the bandwidth needs in the process.

WHAT DO I GET OUT OF IT?

Not a fat lot, to be honest….but just imagine the joy you will bring to all the gardeners of the world. Come rain or shine there they are, out in their plots working the earth, sipping from hip flasks and leaning on their forks every now and again whilst they have a wee chat. Your lovingly crafted mix could be their soundtrack, and that’s a nice thing.

That said, if you live locally we could chuck a few spuds your way. Maybe the odd leek or beetroot, too.

I NEED TO KNOW MORE!

If you have any further questions then email camellotment@gmail.com

*********************************************************************

We still have two more rows to dig up and we’re now having chips with everything and will be for some time…

Eagle-eyed readers will also spot 2 (Two) beetroot plants. They were only tiddlers, so we left the rest in the ground

The Leeks are currently Top of the Pops down at Camellotment. Check out those bad boys….and they won’t be harvested for several months yet.

They could end up being the Biggest Leeks Ever Grown..watch this space.

In other news, the Lads from The Council finally did the nasty on the dreaded japanese knotweed. As the picture below show, the WALL OF KNOTWEED is now looking worse for wear.

Nice one, The Lads from The Council. Have a day off on us!

You can now see The Bench again (…just about. If you quint)

Cabbage and Purple Sprouting Brocolli. The Net (Cost: £3.80) is supposed to stop birds eating the crops.

The Spuds are flowering…

More Spuds….

Aspects of Deidre…

Giant Onions - not so giant as yet.

£3.80 well spent..

£3.80 well spe……oh feck.

Birds don’t eat Knotweed.

Robson fails to fly the newly purchased Camellotment Kite (Cost: £1)

The Office. Do not disturb.

If chemicals are dangerous, why do they come in such fun packaging?

Val takes a tour of the overgrown South End of the plot..

Robson & Deidre.

The fucking lazy bastards at the council continue to refuse to come and spray evil stuff on the Japanese Knotweed.

We’re not allowed to chop it down (because it will spread).

If we do chop it down we’re not allowed to burn it (because fires are banned after the end of March).

Behind the Knotweed and Val there is, trust us, yet another seating area

The overgrown South End of the plot. 

If and when it EVER stops raining we are hiring an industrial strimmer to tackle this bit. (Cost: £41 per day)

This photo makes me think of the movie “Top Gun”.

The Knotweed continues to grow.

The council lads are meanwhile enjoying another 3 day week.

We are still not allowed to burn it down.

Deidre keeps an eye of the place until we can return…

Before the floods we planted a scarecrow.

Remember April 2007? What a month that was, eh.

We crossed off Item # 456 on the Camellotment “To-Do” list when we purchased an ‘all-weather’ ashtray.

Larry The Lavender Plant.

The dreaded Japanese Knotweed started to make a comeback. We plan to get vicious on it’s ass in May. The plan involves weapons-grade Flamethrowers.

Allotment Secretary Martin Reeve explains “for the 3rd and final time” that the use of Flamethrowers is strictly prohibited.

It all started to take some kind of shape…..

The Shed in all it’s dank and dusty glory.

Phew! That was April.

We planted:

 - Onions (Red, White and Spanish)

 - Garlic

 - Lavender

 - Mint

 - Beetroot

 - Spinach

& last but not least:

 - Rhubarb 

…but the Rhubarb died, the first significant casualty.

We’ll never forget you, Rhubarb.

Never.